Monday, May 01, 2006

Cat Scratch Fever - Monday edition

Billy Wagner has just struck out two in the top of the ninth, so I’m going to start blogging right now, as I am certain the Metropolitans will win the game during the bottom of the ninth. We're still in a commercial break.

Man, the Mets sure hate smoking don't they? Every other commercial on SNY is somebody getting a lung taken out or someone with chemo or someone just wasting away. Enough to make a guy quit smoking for mescaline.

Kazuo Matsui is up. He's been booed tonight, but played a nice game with a double and some solid plays in the field. I can't stand this Majewski cat who pitches for the Nats. I grew up across the street from people with a name similar to Majewski. Big time white trash. Had like 16 boats in their yard, despite no one being a fisherman in the family. Kaz strikes out. So much for the element of surprise.

Julio "The Ageless Wonder" Franco is up. I think this weekend's series against the Braves was the first time Atlanta fans cheered a person of color since Henry Aaron's 715th. 3-1 count, Majewski taking his time...Franco, Franco, let's prove again we have a...ball four. Willie, can we get someone out there to run for this...OK Edny Chavez.

Jose Reyes up. Walked three times yesterday. Clearly the end times are upon us. Base hit, in the left infield gap. Very nice. Hey, is there a more dislikable guy in baseball than Alfonso Soriano? I know what a jerk Barry Bonds is and I know what a terrible person Gary Sheffield is, but what's wrong with this guy? Somebody force-feed Soriano a ham sandwich, please. He looks like a refugee.

LoDuca up. Base hi..Oh Crap! Oh yes! Beautiful! Mets Win! Mets Win! Frank Robinson needs a whiskey straight! Jerry Seinfeld needs to hug people! Where the heck is Keith Hernandez?!

To recap: Good teams win when they play poorly. Despite Victor Zambrano being on the field, the Mets won. Gotta win these division games at home. Gotta put up Calvin Broadus numbers.



Vote for Pedro

Ballots can now be cast in the race for this season's All Star Game. C'mon, Metropolitans fans. For the first time in years, we can legitimately vote for several players on our team, so we can't let them down.

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